Friday, August 11, 2006
Where's My Prozac?
ARGH! I'm soooo impatient today and it's not even noon! I find, now that I'm off of my Prozac, that I'm a little angrier and a little more impatient. It's A LOT of work to be off of my Prozac.
I have to be conscious ALL of the time. Of every thought!
I suppose to be the best possible person that I can be I should to be conscious all the time anyway. There's always a little voice inside that has to rein me in saying things like, "Okay, Loralee, calm down." "Loralee take the higher road." "Why are you so mad, Loralee?" "Okay, Loralee, what do we need to do now?" (Wow. Just reading this makes me tired.) Like I said before it's A LOT of work!
And you can't really explain depression to people who don't suffer it. You can't explain the anxiety, the lows, the self deprecation, the being "so over whelmed" feelings, the "what's wrong with me?" thoughts that you have. (I have tried to explain myself to my Mom, and God bless her, she tries to understand but she can't relate at all as she is not depressed. Neither is my brother. My Dad was.) And it's not like those things are going on inside of you 24/7. I have a wonderful life and I'm very content. I am, indeed, very blessed.
It's just something that you have to deal with.
I have people say to me all of the time, "Wow! You sure don't seem like you're a depressed person!" I understand where they're coming from because I laugh A LOT! I'm bubbly, I'm funny and I have fun. (Did you know that a huge percentage of comedians are clinically depressed? Humor is a great way to mask things.) Also, I'm a communicator and I have a good time wherever I go. I guess this is why people don't understand it. It seems like such a contradiction. And, of course, there are varying degrees of depression. I'm pretty sure mine is a mild degree.
Anyway, this post took an entirely different direction than I intended. Guess I needed to vent, huh? I don't feel so impatient anymore. Not quite as angry. Sigh. Thank you all for listening...
I have to be conscious ALL of the time. Of every thought!
I suppose to be the best possible person that I can be I should to be conscious all the time anyway. There's always a little voice inside that has to rein me in saying things like, "Okay, Loralee, calm down." "Loralee take the higher road." "Why are you so mad, Loralee?" "Okay, Loralee, what do we need to do now?" (Wow. Just reading this makes me tired.) Like I said before it's A LOT of work!
And you can't really explain depression to people who don't suffer it. You can't explain the anxiety, the lows, the self deprecation, the being "so over whelmed" feelings, the "what's wrong with me?" thoughts that you have. (I have tried to explain myself to my Mom, and God bless her, she tries to understand but she can't relate at all as she is not depressed. Neither is my brother. My Dad was.) And it's not like those things are going on inside of you 24/7. I have a wonderful life and I'm very content. I am, indeed, very blessed.
It's just something that you have to deal with.
I have people say to me all of the time, "Wow! You sure don't seem like you're a depressed person!" I understand where they're coming from because I laugh A LOT! I'm bubbly, I'm funny and I have fun. (Did you know that a huge percentage of comedians are clinically depressed? Humor is a great way to mask things.) Also, I'm a communicator and I have a good time wherever I go. I guess this is why people don't understand it. It seems like such a contradiction. And, of course, there are varying degrees of depression. I'm pretty sure mine is a mild degree.
Anyway, this post took an entirely different direction than I intended. Guess I needed to vent, huh? I don't feel so impatient anymore. Not quite as angry. Sigh. Thank you all for listening...
# posted by Loralee @ 11:22 AM 
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Yup. Been there. I also think, though that we have it a bit easier because we can laugh through LOADS of ick. It helps me, at least.
It seems like 50% of the women I meet say they are clinically depressed. I certainly hope I'm not to blame. I haven't dated that many of you.
BTW, CLL, where's my link on your blogroll? You still have the "edit me" links up, reminding people that you used a prefab template.
BTW, CLL, where's my link on your blogroll? You still have the "edit me" links up, reminding people that you used a prefab template.
I don't know how to do any of that stuff. I'll have small child's Dad help me. I told you, Alex, I'm a computer DORK! I think I need to take a class at the college! And I almost blamed you for my depression but I did the math. I went on Prozac 7 years ago so you couldn't have been responsible for my decline.....
I'll get on that blogroll thingy...
I'll get on that blogroll thingy...
yeah i still dont get the depressed/anxiety thing. all this time i thought i had only anxiety and now i realize that i have had both. wer'e here for you though loralee. at least we can relate. (here's where i wont pull a cheryl, ok?)
# posted by 
: 7:49 PM
: 7:49 PM
Melisa, thank you sweet girl.
Alex, I really, really know you haven't pulled THIS Cheryl. And be thankful that you haven't.....
Alex, I really, really know you haven't pulled THIS Cheryl. And be thankful that you haven't.....
Oh. Is Cheryl one of those girls who, when your buddy sets you up on a blind date with her, is described as having "a great personality?"
No. She's actually quite attractive but she talks incessantly about herself and NEVER listens.....it's maddening!
Oh. That's fine. Men work long and hard on the ability to tune out women. If we said anything more than "mm-hmm" every time there was a pause in the monologue, we might actually have to hear about how her day went, what great deals she saw while shoe shopping, and how everyone else's relationships have dramatically evolved in the last 24 hours.
I haven't paid attention to a damned thing a woman has said to me since I was fifteen years old.
I haven't paid attention to a damned thing a woman has said to me since I was fifteen years old.
I think all men should wear a t-shirt that says, "Mmmm-hmmmm!"
Then you wouldn't even have to say it.
Then you wouldn't even have to say it.
and... if you try to talk about your own self for a second, she cuts you off and does the "one upping" thing. who cares if your foot got ran over by your grandma's wheelchair, her leg got ran over by a tractor. ughhh! i have learned to do the nod and "mm hmm" myself. (im turning into a guy)
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# posted by : 2:25 PM
: 2:25 PM << Home
